Taylor TAYLER Tailor

COSMO SEX TIP #8329

arekelly:

Instead of moaning during climax say “Flash 9 required for audio”.

nickoffermen:

is it age-appropriate for a seventeen year old to call a mean person a weenie

crumpetmarypoppinstea:

twiliprincess:

is it bad that i’ve

watched hair tutorials for girls as future reference

for when i have daughters

because i want to be the kind of dad that knows how to do his daughter’s hair

this is the cutest thing I have ever read omg

(Source: venipede)

satans-fabulous-blog:

morphingly:

brightredkettle:

are you the SAT because i’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes

with a ten minute break halfway through for snacks

That’s the most reasonable pick up line I’ve ever heard. You’re hired.

robertoluongo:

in grade 8 i did a power point presentation on “whooping cough” and my opening slide was a photo of whoopi goldberg coughing and i was the only person who laughed at it and i couldnt start the presentation for like five minutes because i was laughing too hard at my own joke

menstruate:

red white and blue are the colors of freedom until they’re flashing in your rearview mirror

fefeferi:

when u accidentally hurt ur friends feelings and they insist that its fine but u know it isnt

lampsarepeopletoo:

they call me macklemore in math class because im like

what what what what what

what what what what what what what

what what what what